What Is Missing in My Life Right Now?
By Stacy LaMorte
We do all sorts of things in our lives to fill voids, which is only human. However, it is important for us and for us to teach our kids how to build awareness around what we are actually seeking when we do the things to fill the void.
Most times, what we are seeking is God. We want connection, hope, love, fulfillment, acceptance or even just rest, but we look for it in all the wrong places.
In my burgeoning coaching business, I am encountering people day after day who are filling their lives with tangible things, food or alcohol, and even exercise in the hope of making themselves feel more complete when what they really want is connection.
We usually get to the fact that they want connection with their spouses, children or other family members, but, ultimately, they may want connection with God. Most of the time I do not bring Catholicism into my coaching unless I have permission to do so, but I can ask questions about spiritual connection to a higher power. What are you really seeking? For what are you really looking?
It has been very powerful to see people make changes in their lives that have come from a newfound awareness. When I was in my mid-20s, I was seeing a therapist to help with some relationship issues. During one session I was talking about scrubbing something in my apartment to the point where I actually hurt myself and she asked, “What were you really trying to clean?”
Whoa. I was trying to clean up the mess I was making in my life. I was trying to gain some kind of balance and control. Do I still deep clean things in my house when I feel out of control? Yep. But, now, I ask myself what I am trying to “clean” or control and spend that time building awareness. I come away with clean grout and fresh perspective, and I talk to God about it and hand it over to him.
So, next time you are reaching for something and you don’t really know why – whether it’s a cookie or a new purse or scrubbing something with more vigor than normal – ask God, “Lord, what is missing in my life right now?” and sit with him to find out.