Good at What?

By Ty Salvant

On Dec. 19, Derrick and I were blessed with the birth of our sixth child, Synclair Marie.

She has been such a gift to our family. Upon meeting Synclair, well-meaning friends, acquaintances and family members ask, “Is she good?” Because I have asked that question before, I know what they mean.

However, at this stage in my life, the question doesn’t sit well with me. “Is she good” is such a loaded question seeking so much information. Does she sleep well? Is she colicky? Does she cry? Is she a happy baby? Does she nurse well? Is she easy to care for?

Regardless of the answers, those traits don’t make her good. A sleep-deprived mother who is caring for a colicky baby needs to feel supported. She doesn’t deserve to be made to feel that her child is judged as being “not good” by others simply because that baby has sleep or digestive or sensory struggles. If baby sleeps all night or never slept, cries incessantly or infrequently, this has nothing to do with her goodness.

According to Psalm 139:13-14, “You formed my inmost being; you knit me in my mother’s womb. I praise you, because I am wonderfully made; wonderful are your works! My very self you know.”

All babies are good. Every. Last. One. Colicky or not, easy or not, healthy or not. Please don’t ask moms if their baby is good.

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